Tuesday 12 May 2015

Married men announce their bona fide extramarital affairs

Posted By: Hips Tan - Tuesday, May 12, 2015

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Singapore, 18 May – Normally conservative Singapore has seen a surge in married local men admitting publicly on their social media pages that they patronize the red houses of Geylang and Desker Road, in what was previously a taboo.

This, after it was noted that there was no question of integrity as long as the parties genuinely think there is a bona fide relationship, and the difference between an extramarital affair and just having sex was clearly explained in a diagram, which is also called an infographic. 



"We are just having sex," Lao Tiko said as he walked to the red house in Geylang to choose his favourite girl from the fish tank, No. 18. "People need to know the difference between an extramarital affair, which involves feelings, and just having sex because my wife is having her period and is tired after a long day of work. It doesn't reflect on my integrity when I proposed to my wife, it was based on the salary I earned and the car I drove, and whether we could get a HDB in a prime location or not."

Lao Tiko’s wife of 10 years, Sha Tian Zhen, is supportive. “When Lao Tiko proposed, I disregarded the fact that he was having sex with chickens every week as it was not relevant and I assessed him based on a more stringent criteria for his salary and brand of car that he drove. For example, if he hadn’t been fucking around, a $5k monthly salary and Toyota Vios would do, but now that he is, I require a $8k salary and a Volkswagen Golf at least.” 

Marriage counselor Lao Zha Bor added that spouses have a primary responsibility to ensure the faithfulness and salary of their partners. 

- PCB 

About Hips Tan

Hips Tan can be found sipping her latte at a cafe in Tiong Bahru, where she writes her articles. She thinks that LimpehFT, asingaporeanson and other bloggers are pussies who sit on the toilet seat when they do a piss, and are too soft to write this shit.

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