Friday, 15 May 2015

Singaporean Filipino accents suggests warming of ties

Posted By: Hips Tan - Friday, May 15, 2015

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Singapore, May 15 - Xenophobic Singaporeans from all walks of life are no longer being lectured by Ministers to reflect on themselves after what is seen as a warming of ties between the Philippines and Singapore.

This is due to a huge spike in young Singaporeans who have gone overseas from between 3 days to 3 years to a Western country and have returned with Filipino accents. It is believed this is an attempt by enterprising Singaporeans to kill two birds with one stone, by having a posh Western accent which ends up sounding Filipino, and by making our Filipino guests and residents alike feel at home in Singapore.

Ms. Kentang Jean Baguette said, "You know, I can't help having an Australian accent since I studied there on exchange for 6 months, so its understandable if Singaporeans don't understand me anymore."

Mr. Jin Wu Lui, whose son, Pai Ka Zhai, studied in Australia, was more critical. "I send this asshole overseas to study and tell everyone about it, but this guy comes back without an accent. How to compete in the workforce like that?" Mr Jin expects to have to dip into his CPF savings to send his son for another stint in Australia to brush up on his accent.

Lee Tong Zhi was curious. "I wonder why people don't come back with China accented English after spending time in China."

About Hips Tan

Hips Tan can be found sipping her latte at a cafe in Tiong Bahru, where she writes her articles. She thinks that LimpehFT, asingaporeanson and other bloggers are pussies who sit on the toilet seat when they do a piss, and are too soft to write this shit.

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